Positive Wellbeing for Children and Families

Research consistently shows a strong link between positive well-being, robust mental health, and the ability to build resilience, all of which lead directly to improved outcomes for both children and adults.

The NHS have used research based evidence to highlight 5 steps that we can all take to improve our mental health and wellbeing:

Connect with other people.
Be physically active.
Learn new skills.
Give to others (acts of kindness).
Pay attention to the present moment (mindfulness).

You can find out more about the 5 Steps to Mental Wellbeing here.

We have put together the information below to explore how these five steps can be implemented both at home and at school to effectively support and improve mental health and well-being for neurodivergent children and their families.

The 5 Steps to Mental Wellbeing for Neurodivergent Children & Their Families

These steps are designed to be simple, predictable, and supportive for both the child and the parent/carer.

Step 1: Connect – ‘Connect in a Calm Way’

This step focusses on meaningful, low-stress interactions rather than overwhelming social demands.

For the Child	For the Parent/Carer
* Shared Special Interest: Spend time with family doing an activity you love, like watching a favourite show or building with blocks. This is a calm way to be together.	* Follow the Child's Lead: Join their special interest (e.g., talk about trains, play a video game) for 10 minutes without asking lots of questions.
* Predictable Greetings: Use a familiar way to say hello or goodbye (a high-five, a wave, or a specific phrase) to reduce anxiety.	* Use Visuals: Use visual schedules or social stories to prepare the child for visitors or social calls.
* Check-In Spot: Identify a quiet, safe person or spot to go to when you feel lonely or worried.	* Connect with Others: Reach out to other parents of neurodivergent children for understanding and support. You are not alone.

Step 2: Be Active – ‘Move Your Body to Feel Better’

Focus on sensory-regulating and predictable movements that help discharge energy and calm the nervous system.

For the Child	For the Parent/Carer
* Sensory Movement: Try activities that help you feel organised, like swinging, deep pressure squeezes (a 'squish'), or bouncing on a gym ball.	* Schedule Movement Breaks: Build 3-5 short 'Movement Breaks' into the daily visual schedule (e.g., 5 minutes of jumping jacks, a walk around the garden).
* Predictable Routes: Take a walk on the same route every day so you know exactly what to expect.	* Create a Safe Space: Ensure a safe area for stimming (self-stimulating behaviour) and intense movement, like a trampoline or a cushioned corner.
* Heavy Work: Help with a chore that involves 'heavy work' (pushing a laundry basket, carrying heavy books) to feel grounded.	* Reward Effort, Not Perfection: Praise them for trying, even if they only move for a short time.

Step 3: Take Notice – ‘Notice the Calm & Predictable’

This step is about tuning into the immediate environment for specific details that provide comfort and understanding, rather than abstract "mindfulness."

For the Child	For the Parent/Carer
* Sensory Focus: Notice a specific, comfortable sensory detail: the colour of a favourite toy, the sound of the dishwasher, or the texture of a soft blanket.	* Use Concrete Language: Guide them to "Take Notice" using very clear, concrete questions: "What is the temperature of the water?" or "Can you hear the clock ticking?"
* Routine Check: Look at your visual schedule to know what is happening now and what is next. This helps you feel in control.	* Slow Down Transition: Pause before moving to the next activity. Give a 5-minute warning and a clear cue.
* Comfort Spot: Spend a quiet moment in your safe space with your favourite items, focusing on how they feel and smell.	* Model Calm: Take a deep breath yourself and describe what you are noticing (e.g., "I notice the soft light outside").

Step 4: Keep Learning – ‘Learn Skills for Life & Calm’

Focus on mastering specific, functional skills and learning new ways to self-regulate and manage emotions.

For the Child	For the Parent/Carer
* Master a Skill: Practise a specific, useful life skill (tying shoes, making a snack) until you feel confident.	* Break It Down: Use task analysis (breaking a skill into small steps) and visuals to teach new routines and skills.
* Learn a Tool: Practise using a tool to manage big feelings, like a fidget toy or a simple breathing technique (e.g., 'Bumblebee Breath').	* Focus on Strengths: Create opportunities for the child to use their special interest or natural talent to achieve something and feel successful.
* Understand Feelings: Learn to name your feelings using emotions cards or a feelings chart.	* Teach Self-Advocacy: Help your child learn one phrase they can use to ask for help or a break (e.g., "I need quiet").

Step 5: Give – ‘Give & Be Helpful in a Fixed Way’

This is about finding structured, predictable, and low-pressure ways to contribute, which builds self-esteem and a sense of belonging.

For the Child	For the Parent/Carer
* Fixed Task: Complete your one specific chore on the schedule (e.g., feed the pet, wipe the table). Knowing your job helps you feel important.	* Structure the Giving: Assign one clear, consistent job to the child each day/week, making the expectations totally predictable.
* Help a Friend/Family: Offer help in a simple, non-verbal way, like handing someone a needed item or sharing a favourite toy.	* Acknowledge Their Contribution: Use specific praise: "Thank you for putting the cups away! You were so helpful."
* Share a Special Interest: Teach a family member one fun fact about your special interest.	* Connect Giving to Routine: Integrate the 'giving' activity into a familiar daily routine so it becomes expected and less stressful.